Why are we so unhappy? Why aren’t we grateful for so much good that comes our way?

The answer is simple. We don’t appreciate our life sufficiently because it is scattered with so much frustration and challenge. True, there is much positive in our lives but we keep getting distracted with those annoying gaps of challenges that keep appearing out of nowhere.

We have set for ourselves so many noble goals in life yet the distractions of pursuing a livelihood, paying our bills, raising our children and all the other ‘demons’ that constantly creep in and detour us from achieving our dreams, deplete our energy, leaving us no strength to even try.

How can we reach this elusive goal of attaining true happiness?

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The mitzvah of bringing Bikkurim, the first-fruits, and reciting the special declaration associated with it, has a prerequisite of being done with joy.

That declaration expresses a brief sketch of Jewish history beginning from the episode with Lavan trying to destroy Yaakov which initiated a chain of events that brought us down to Egypt and eventually to the Promised Land and all its luscious fruit.

Why does our history lesson begin with Lavan trying to defeat Yaakov?

The Holy Meor V’Shemesh interprets the words ×�ר×�×� ×�×�×� ×�×�×�, The Aramean tried to to destroy my forefather, in a most creative and insightful way.

The word ×�×�×� is rooted in the sentiment ×�×�×�, which means literally ‘to want’. What we are focusing on here is not ‘simply’ Lavan’s desire to kill our forefather Yaakov, but more significantly to crush him emotionally, to quash his ambition and drive for all things spiritual. In a constant onslaught of deception and taunting Lavan sought to drain Yaakov of all his emotional energy.

The key to happiness stems in being able to identify those challenges as one’s only road to success and greatness. When we can joyously thank G-d for the difficulties He has sent our way, whether in the guise of Lavan or behind the dark cloak of the Egyptians, appreciating how these ‘distractions’ forge our spiritual identity when we succeed in overcoming them, then we can first achieve genuine joy.

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The Mishnah describes how the bringers of Bikkurim would parade their first-fruits through the streets on their way to Jerusalem, in a musical procession led by an ox ornamented with gold glazed horns and wearing a  ×¢×�ר×� ש×� ×�×�ת, a crown fashioned from olives.

The saintly Sifsei Tzaddik questions as to why of all the seven species the land was blessed with is the olive selected as the theme of this crown.

The olive, he points out, only produces its ‘liquid gold’ after undergoing an arduous process of being pounded, pressed and crushed. Similarly the Jewish nation understands and appreciates that its essence can only be procured through the trials and tribulations that force us to face our inherent greatness. It is for this reason the Mishnah tells us that this declaration is joyously recited ‘while the laden basket of first-fruits is carried upon our shoulder’. This is the image of greatness, bearing the weight, placing our entire body to the task, with glee and gratitude.

The ensuing paragraph describing briefly the ordeal in Egypt until we entered the holy land are recited too with that sense of joy and appreciation for all the difficulties that we have faced that helped make us into who we are today.

One must first acknowledge this accomplishment in order to be worthy of a ‘Crown of Olives’!

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Recently I had the privilege of meeting the two happiest people on earth.

The first was an accomplished Torah scholar who was stricken with a life threatening disease several years ago. He is also a renowned and most trusted treasurer for a charity fund that distributes several millions of dollars yearly for many a decade. Despite his debilitated state he continues to carry out his duties to the best of his ability. Hairless from the toxic therapies he receives regularly and clearly in excruciating pain, when you visit him all you feel is warmth, all you see are smiles and all you hear is praise for G-d and love for humanity. His prayer is awe inspiring and one merely has to hear him enthusiastically answer Amen yehei Shemei Rabbah... to feel like you are in the presence of the loving G-d.

He is a living medical miracle as all the doctors claim that logically he shouldn’t be alive.

Before departing he shared with me his ‘secret’ to happiness and survival.

King David sings: �ִּ� �ֲ�ַת �ָ�ָ� תּ�ֹ�ֶ�ָּ ֹשְ�ֵרִ�ת �ֵ�ֹת תַּ�ְ�ֹר -���� ע� ��, Surely the wrath of man shall praise You; the residue of wrath shall You restrain.

He explained that what the verse is revealing to us is that when a person is enduring suffering, the apparent ‘wrath’ of G-d, yet realizes that he must nevertheless ‘thank’ G-d for his ordeal, that is when G-d restrains the rest. This, he told me, is how he lives, by sincerely ‘thanking’ the Almighty for the gift of his suffering and that’s why he feels he is still alive today despite the odds!

The second happiest person I met was a close friend of the first fellow. I met him as he straggled in to visit him. He was seemingly elderly and evidently impaired as he could only walk with a walker and was obviously partially paralyzed. After exchanging warm words with his friend we offered to drive him home after discovering that he ‘shlepped’ there by bus all by himself!

We brought him into a nondescript building without any sign indicating any dormitory let alone a visible address. When we entered we discovered that within these several combined apartments was a midreshet for young women who have nowhere to live. Many were abused and abandoned by their parents. Some had forlornly resorted to roaming the streets sadly surviving by whatever means available and were literally homeless. This Rabbi for decades has been pulling young women, from all over Israel, from the depths of despondency, restoring not only their bodies and health but their souls as well. There were a variety of colors and types among this robust cadre of young women with the common denominator bonding them, their common sense of being loved, cherished and cared for by this amazing Rabbi and his family. A large poster hung in his meager office, with a picture of him standing next to a beaming Rav Ovadia Yosef zt”l, was signed by the women in loving tribute to ‘Abba’ David.

We asked him how he came to undertake this enormous task and he began to share with us his personal story.

As an infant he contracted an inflammation of the brain that required him to be hospitalized for several formative years of his early life. He was left partially and legally blind as a result and because of his handicap remained illiterate throughout his years in school. Despite this frustration he never gave up. Upon entering the army he took advantage of some remedial educational classes and finally learned how to read. It was then that he discovered religion and committed himself to assuring that others would never succumb to despair. He managed despite his eye impairment to obtain a driver’s license. Only in Israel! He went on to write several self-help books relating to physical and spiritual health.

He shared that already from a young age he resolved "ש×�×£ ×�×�ר ×�×� ×�עצ×�ר ×�×�ת×�!", “ That I would never let anything stop me from attaining my goals”.

Several years ago he was stricken with a stroke that crippled him and prevented this mighty little man from walking unaided. Ironically, the resulting brain damage also disabled his brain from processing the written word, and once again he was illiterate.

But it didn’t stop him from scouring the streets, in that pathetic condition, to collect lost souls. Nor did it prevent him from ‘climbing Mount Everest’, lugging himself onto a jostling bus, traveling across  town to visit his dear friend and bring him some strawberry-banana drink he knew his infirm friend liked.

This man didn’t complain once and was as happy as you could imagine despite his tragic circumstance and lot in life. We subsequently found out that he was all of fifty four years old!

But nothing could discourage him or get him down. Surveying his precious ‘children’ he felt he was the luckiest man in the world. He brightened as he pointed out one of the young ladies who was about to get married, ‘shepping’ unbelievable ‘nachas’, pride and joy.

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We always read this week’s portion, which describes the terrible tragedies that will befall our people, two Shabbosos prior to Rosh Hashana, leaving a safe gap between the two, so that we may symbolically ‘do away with the year and its curses’.

Does that really help? Can merely ‘shoving it quickly under the carpet’ avoid the consequences of our sins?

We are taught that the spaces between the paragraphs in the Torah is so that we have time to stop to ponder and absorb its message.

Perhaps that is our goal, to allow ourselves to realize how fortunate we are and to give praise and thanks for our travails so that we may deter more from coming our way.

Our joy for the positive things that come our way will be enormously magnified if we appreciate the tough times too. It is not a gap but rather a continuous loving relationship we have with G-d that never ceases.

The Jerusalem Talmud states that even in earlier times when it was customary for only the first reader who was called up to the Torah to recite the fore blessing on the public Torah reading on behalf of all subsequent readers and only the last reader would say the final after blessing upon conclusion of the reading, when it came to reading the portion of the Tochacha, the Admonition, it would warrant its own blessing before and after its specific reading.

The great Rabbinic luminary and prolific author, Rabbi Shlomo Kluger, suggests this is to assert our realization that this dire prophecy of pain and suffering is really ‘a blessing’. These are the ‘sufferings of love’.

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This is an arduous task. But greatness doesn’t come easy. Merely being aware of this notion is encouraging and soothing.

May we be inspired by the many special souls among us who sense G-d’s love even in the most trying of times, and may we begin to see the light and experience exquisite joy in our service to G-d.

May we spend a week contemplating our greatness and enter the Days of Awe with a renewed sense of joy and privilege!

May we thank G-d for all that comes our way and may we never give up!

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