Do you have mixed feelings and experience a range of emotions just by hearing the term emotional ambivalence? If so, that is completely normal. In fact, that is exactly what emotional ambivalence refers to: the simultaneous experience of positive and negative emotions about something. For many years, it was believed that we only use 10 percent of our brain, and the other 90 percent just sat idle. This is a myth. The human mind is capable – far more capable than we often think – of so much, we can even experience opposite emotions at the same time. Incredibly, we can have two completely mutually exclusive feelings and reactions in our psyche that coexist simultaneously.
Remarkably, in an article on Frontiers in Psychology, professors Franki Kung and Melody Chao reveal that research has begun to explore the overall impact of mixed emotions (a.k.a. emotional ambivalence), and has shown that the experience of mixed emotions can help people think creatively, connect seemingly unrelated ideas, which, in turn, can increase creative performance.
They explain that to think creatively means that one needs to be aware of and be able to combine discrepant information to form a novel and useful idea. Mixed emotions provide conflicting information, which can potentially be a thought-provoking experience.
My friends, it is quite fascinating if you think about it. The Torah tells us (Chapter 18, Verse 9) that Yisro rejoiced – ויחד יתרו. The strange verbiage, ויחד, instead of the more classic, ושמח, teaches us (see Rashi; see also Sanhedrin 94a) that in addition to feeling excited and happy to becoming a Jewish convert, he also became covered in goosebumps – חידודים – because of the distress that he felt at the downfall of Egypt, his old nation.
We see from here something incredible. Yisro experienced these two reactions – feeling excited to become a Jew and feeling distressed because of Egypt’s downfall – at the same time! He was going through a deep spiritual maturation process of emotional ambivalence.
And what happened next is astonishing. Yisro, despite having these mixed emotions – or perhaps because of his willingness to embrace these opposing emotions – was now able to think creatively and out of the box. The very next verse tells us that Yisro said those two famous words: ברוך ה' – Blessed is G-d!
In the world at large, when experiencing emotional ambivalence, most people describe it as “feeling torn” or “conflicted.” This negative outlook, perhaps, comes from a lack of understanding of the creative potential that lies within. Yisro too, experienced opposite emotions, but instead of “feeling torn” and conflicted,” he rejoiced and ultimately was able to proclaim: “Blessed is G-d.”
Yisro totally embraced the emotional ambivalence taking place within his psyche, and perhaps this allowed him to think outside the box. He converted to Judaism and was led down a path of spiritual commitment, joy, and a greater sense of self and purpose. In our lives, we can strive to do the same.
Have a holy Shabbos!
