Baltimore, MD – Apr. 12, 2018 - Today is Holocaust Memorial Day. It is hard to describe the weight and impact of the Holocaust on the modern Jew. It is inescapable, it’s shadow follows me everywhere, always. There is guilt over the relative easy and free life which we have, a stark contrast to the horror that faced our brothers and sisters then.

I feel a tremendous need to give back somehow, though I do not know how I possibly can. Even as I force myself to contemplate what the Holocaust was, I flee from the shear emotional burden of facing that level of human loss and suffering, and the terror that such evil could be perpetrated by human beings. It is a reminder of my difference from the world, that I could be the target of such systemic hatred and destruction.

Hatred burns in me as well, for those who killed innocent men, murdered women, and slaughtered children. For those who separated families and swept away cultures. I also can't stop myself from being hyper-aware of the numbness that distance has created. How fast the contorted and evil can become mundane. Today, even as those who survived the camps still live, there are others who deny the very legitimacy of their trauma.

The last feeling is a strange one: it is one of immense pride. We are alive, we are thriving. I am 17 and a proud Jew. I am a senior at one of hundreds of Jewish High schools dedicated to continuing Jewish tradition, and my family is a member of one of thousands of synagogues in the world that is packed each Shabbos with worshipers.

As much as I am a target of hate, I am a part of a people that has overcome the worst of persecutions. With every day I wake up proud of my Judaism, with every step I take proudly wearing my Kippa, with every beat of my heart, I claim another victory against those who would have destroyed us.

Yaakov Garfield is a Senior at Mechina of Ner Yisroel Henry Beren High School