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Parshas Emor - Begin Fueling Now

By BJLife/Ori Strum

Posted on 05/05/23

Parshas HaShavua Divrei Torah sponsored by
Dr. Shapsy Tajerstein, DPM - Podiatry Care.
(410) 788-6633

So, there I was, by a gas station, getting ready to fill up my car with gas. Why? Because that’s what you do at a gas station. I pulled out my credit card and stuck it in the slot, and as usual, waited a few moments until the screen displayed the following message: Approved. Begin Fueling Now.  


This is a typical story. A common occurrence. We’ve all been there and done that. But for the first time in my life, I stopped and thought about the powerful inspiration that this display message was teaching. That is, the importance of approval.  


Human beings have a natural tendency to need approval. We need to be acknowledged and respected; in short, we need to know that we exist. And it is these moments of approval and acknowledgement that allows us to “begin fueling now.” Approval gives us a sense of belief and trust in ourselves. Approval gives us the fuel to keep driving and going places. Approval helps us overcome the risk of suffering from isolation and loneliness. 


Recently, the Surgeon General Vivek Murthy released an advisory on the importance of social connection in an increasingly isolated society. The average time alone has increased from 285 minutes in 2003 to 333 minutes a day in 2020 – an average increase of about one day a month spent entirely alone. Astonishingly, the advisory showed that social isolation is as damaging as smoking 15 cigarettes a day, or having six drinks a day. Loneliness increases the risk of heart disease and stroke by about 30%. Chronic loneliness can increase the risk of dementia by 50%.  


We currently find ourselves in the ימי הספירה, the Days of Sefiras HaOmer, as the Torah states: וספרתם לכם ממחרת השבת. We count the 49 days between the leaving of Egypt and the giving of the Torah on Mt. Sinai.  


We are so makpid to count, count, count. Every shul announcement includes a Sefira reminder. Every other WhatsApp status has a Sefira reminder. We are in the season of counting. Besides for setting reminders to count the day, it is imperative to make sure we set reminders to count each other. Sefiras HaOmer reminds us that I count, he counts, she counts, they count; we all count.  


When we say hello, nod, or smile at another human being, we are giving them approval. We are showing them that they count. During these days, in particular, let us make sure we are acting with כבוד זה לזה – respect for one another.  


Here is something practical to work on during these days. One of my pet peeves is when two people walk by each other on the street, and guy A pretends to check his phone while guy B glances at the flowers on a nearby tree. Let’s face the facts. Guy A didn’t have any new calls, texts, or emails. And guy B never cared about a tree in his life. Deep down, we all want connection. Let’s not run away and hide from that which we really want. Let’s give others approval and acknowledge that they exist. 


Have a holy Shabbos